“-It’s impossible for a kid to complain when they’re sucking on a lollipop, like “I don’t want to — [makes sucking sound] – oh, this is cherry!” Just make them sugar-free so you don’t have to worry…
–As a dad, you are the Vice President of the executive branch of parenting. It doesn’t matter what your personality is like, you will always be Al Gore to your wife’s Bill Clinton. She feels the pain and you are the annoying nerd telling them to turn off the lights.
–Understand that kids only want to tell you a secret after they’ve been eating chocolate and you’re wearing a white shirt. “
Article: Jim Gaffigan on his new book ‘Dad Is Fat,’ the perfect children’s story, and surefire parenting tips, Entertainment Weekly